Funeral Services

I came to the computer to share the date and time for the funeral and was waiting for the computer to power up when I noticed a pencil on my desk. 

My desk is a mess right now, piled with things that have needed taken care of for several weeks or more, but I am the only one that can take care of those things, and I just haven't given it the time it needs. 

(I won't for a while still, and I'm okay with that. There are so many things in my life that have been let go, some for a few weeks and some for a few years, so I know my life will begin to get pretty busy this upcoming year since my every moment will not be spent caring for my husband.  It became no easy task the last couple weeks, but I would have kept going as long as I needed to.  In a selfish way I almost wish it could have continued, but not really because I am even more grateful and joyful that he is no longer suffering. I just miss him so much, but I know that is actually a good thing too, because it proves that I loved him.  He was my life for so long. It is hard to just let go. It's such a drastic change.)
I'll try to remember and focus on the fact that I'm Fine!

So this pencil was probably pulled from the pencil jar above my desk a day or two ago because others have been used and left under piles of things on my desk.  No doubt this pencil would have been piled on soon too.  I picked it up to read the saying on it and it was the exact message I had been trying to tell myself this morning - FIND JOY IN THE JOURNEY. 

I am grateful for the tender mercies that we are experiencing of late.  They will surely be what helps me stop crying.  I keep thinking of something I heard Sister Marjorie Pay Hinckley say - 
“The only way to get through life is to laugh your way through it. You either have to laugh or cry. I prefer to laugh. Crying gives me a headache.”  


We are trying to make all the necessary arrangements for the upcoming events in our lives.  It is sometimes a very difficult thing to do, but we are finding joy in being together and looking forward to having the rest of our family with us by the end of next week.

There is a strangeness to the fact that while going through such a difficult time we can find joy in the moment.  I'm sure it is because of the knowledge we have about our Father in Heaven's Plan. 

Okay, now for the reason I sat at this chair this morning -

The funeral will be December 20th at 10:00am in Royal Camp, LDS church.